The Wonder

My heart swells with an intense love for I again am doing what I love.  My clouds came in the moment the music stopped playing.  Sometimes I feel like my soul is one giant record player.  But it stopped.  The needle didn't follow the grind of the record.  I heard nothing just people talking.  I write often about when you fall out of love with the one thing that feeds you.  I ate but was starving.  I loved but was always searching.  It has been a long road.  Confronted by all the fears you never realized you had.  New York brings things to you at a more intense rate.  Your strength is always tested, your weaknesses are always exposed.  The learning curve sometimes wrecks my brain.  But then you think of your story and know so far deep down that this happened to you for some odd reason and if you gave up now you still would wonder.  This wonder would most certainly take my last breath from me.  This wonder would make me search for the rest of my life.  It would kill me.

I am on my second journey of creating music.  Its the only thing that actually makes sense to me at this point.   The music is the best I have done to date.  If I would have given up, if you gave up during the process you will always wonder.  You will sit there with a half written book, pages tore and thrown away.  You will always paint your ending instead of living it out.  The doors are more open now, the instinct sharper.  I said before that I was in round 35 and had one swing left in me, I was actually in round 10 with much more to go.  Your reality seems much harsher then it actually is.

Here's to my new love affair with music..and in whatever you are doing just remember you are probably not done yet.  Keep going and remember its round 10 not 35 and you always one more punch.

Hurricane Sandy

I live 15 minutes away from Manhattan literally a 4 stop subway ride away.  If I didn't move about a month ago I would have been caught right in it without electricity and flooded streets.  This poem doesn't discredit the damage that many suffered in the mist of the storm.  Having said that I spend about 2 hours within nature a day if one was to quiet themselves for long enough you would hear her discontent, you would understand that she isn't done yet.

Right before the storm I thought it would be a good idea to go to the supermarket and that was a mistake.  I watched people scrambling to grab the last milk, fighting over the last loaf of bread. I was no joke the 75th person in line. The mood was daunting and everyone guarded their place in line as if they were entering the pearly gates of heaven.  Panic, frustration and selfishness..the hurricane didn't bring the brighter side of humanity to light perhaps the aftermath has.

Hurricane Sandy

Your mad at us
I see your frustration
Im not the only one that can sense your fury
That knows of our neglect
I walk into you everyday
From your invisible hush
Your kiss of a summers end to my cheeks
To your incredible silence
I hear that you could destroy us
And it saddens me to say that one day you most certainly will
You hold a grudge
You will sob the biggest tears
Until your hurt is known
You are keeping score
The biggest is yet to come
And we will all be
SHOCKED when it does
We will blame you as the destructive one
Even though I will know it was us all along
You whom takes and gives nothing back
Will be on channel 5 news
Talking about the home you lost
As if mother nature wasn't home enough for you
We will clear shelves in panic
Everyone for themselves
Every last crumb not one left for the mouse
Greedy
Arrogant
You may look the other way
However she always makes herself known
We shall only be so lucky
To walk away with nothing more then a bruise