**The New Direction of Music**

I was driving in my car and heard something very interesting, Flo Rida did a remix featuring Etta James.  Now the last few month of research has brought me to Ms. Etta, Ray Charles, Muddy Waters and some of the artists featured on this here blog.  You might not think that this is a big deal but to me it's pretty epic considering that there is not only a change within the industry right now but the tide is pulling towards simpler times.  T.V is also picking up on the switch with shows like Mad Men (sound familiar) and PANAM.  History repeats itself and although technology is always changing and evolving, society stays the same.

There's a love for this era right now which makes me feel less crazy as this era has become my obsession. My new favorite thing, with a fresh real twist.  I heard that song and although I'm not the biggest Flo Rida fan, smiled.  You get weird signs like that in life.  Like a pat on the back saying your not the only one, others are doing their part to bring back the BIG comeback.

The research is endless.  Movies, media, songs, artists, print, my grandfathers house is like one big achieve.  All you have to do is pull your favorite pieces and put them together into what looks to others like a mess.  My perfect mess then you get little signs pointing you into yet another direction, you travel down it and although it may be a dead end it leads you to something better.  I am excited to see this change  within the industry as most artists lack on so many levels to me.  Where's the showmanship and why the f&^& is auto tune excepted? that's not real that breeds a enforcement where everybody and their mother thinks they got what it takes.  They don't.  Here's another point, music venues will be built for talent they shouldn't be built for talent that doesn't exist.  It's become dry, under impressive and these places aren't making the money they used to because the talent isn't what it used to be.  I'm tired of getting into it with musicians I interview, the good ones understand this.  Working at one of the best jazz clubs in the world and seeing the talent I see only certain people stop me and slap me in the face with how great they are.

There is no better artist then a live one.  There is no better time to bring back this era, then right now.  Im not setteling for this kind of music anymore, I'm creating another kind of style thats real and honest although I know exactly what I'm up against.  Here's to the good fight.

Sample Tracks for 1950's Vision

Dani & The Mad Men™

There's been a lot of behind the scene's work on my next musical adventure.  The sample tracks are out and the image is already underway.  This is my dream vision and now you can hear just a touch of what Dani & The Mad Men™ is all about!

http://soundcloud.com/daniellemueller

Where The %$#^ Is She?

She is beautiful.  Not the kind thats try hard or overdone. fake or untouchable.  Red lip, flowing hair and painted nails.  High waisted skirts, soft delicate skin.  I see her.  Curves in the places a woman should have them regardless of her actual figure.  She is stunning, she is timeless and classic.  She laughs playfully drinking something on the rocks.  She's an image of something protected mostly guarded yet carelessly open and playful.  Her lashes bat and she holds all her strength and presence in an effortless glow.  Where is she?  Sexy, polished, loving, charming, classic and real.  She holds herself like a prize to be won, a prize worth more then money can buy.  High heels, black liner, men stop and open the door for her men stop and light her cigarette.  The way she holds herself is something that makes people stop and watch.  Every eye is on her and she knows it but not in a way thats controlling in a way thats sincere.  She's a magnet, she's contagious, she brings you to her and you may not know why.   She will cry, she will be brilliant, she just will be. She already is.  

I know I see her but too often see a woman thats given up, lost possibly finding herself again.  In remission, in the depths of a recession.  She's there but not fully herself, what if she was fully herself?  

I walked into a Walmart the other day which is rare all in itself.  I stopped right before I checked out and saw women all around me, they almost looked like shadows.  All in what looked to be pi's, hair in a mess walking like robots.  No expression, now I know this was just Walmart but I still couldn't find this woman I describe above.  Although I know that each of them has it none of them actually knew it.  It was sad and odd.  None of them knew that the outside is a reflection of the inside.  Maybe they just ran out of the house, I'm guilty of that.  Maybe they have 4 kids and no time, I get it but there's something telling me that that isn't it.  Sure looks aren't everything, I know but come on YOUR IN PUBLIC.  In the comforts of my own home all I want is sweats and a t-shirt but thats in the comfort of those who know me.  

This is to the beautiful woman, all of you.  Everyone of you, ALL.  The size 2(bitch;-) to the size 18, we are altogether.  We are not separate.  See yourself as your most beautiful self.  Never let anyone take that away from you.  You don't need to loss weight, you are perfect.  Because no-one is like you, you are unique. Put on some lipstick and give a damn.  If you don't see yourself as beautiful, no one will.  There's no-one feeling sorry for yourself, but you.  Come on this isn't a competition, this is a celebration because when your beautiful in the inside your outside tells the whole world that.  GIve a shit for yourself not for anyone else but you.  Your beautiful no-one needs to tell you that, in fact do an exercise for me.  Tell yourself your beautiful until you believe it and watch what happens, others around you will notice it and start in turn telling you of your beauty because it's from within.   

This is to the charming woman I respect, the ones that hold their own when I was weak I looked to you.  To my sisters, going out with them pretty much sums up the energy they hold, I was lucky to get a fraction of it.  Their spirit is beyond generous, their hearts are beyond open and their beauty only gets better with age.  

To my beautiful mother for always being classic, always being real and teaching a little girl that beauty comes from within and the outside will follow.  

Reinvention

I get to do New York City by myself this time.  There is no more liberating feeling then that, where I once felt slighty caged the greatest gift was being freed.  When I think about walking the many endless streets of Manhattan I already feel proud because its my own.  On my own dime, with my own survival instinct.

This place isn't for everyone its dirty, rough and unforgiving.  It chews you up, spits you out gives you a little but takes much more.  It's confusing, packed..perfect.  Even though I only had 5 brief months with it, I wanted more.  I wasn't done with it and never should of left but like I said it was all supposed to happen although it could have been a smoother ride.  My situation couldn't have been any worst in my opinion because I lived it but you know what I did that I did a little thing called-


re·in·vent  verb (used with object)

- to invent again or anew, especially without knowing that the invention already exists.

-to remake or make over, as in a different form.

-to bring back; revive: to reinvent trust and accountability.

You didnt think I was eating cookies and crying all day, did you?  Sure moments happen but come my  situation still doesn't make sense and it NEVER will.  Whats the fucking point?  You protect yourself first and thats the point of it all.  Keep yourself close, hold on and shut up and listen to what you need.  No excuses, have a moment to yourself in fact have many.  Your relationship with number one (yourself) will determine how your number two relationship (partner) goes.  

NYC the first time wasn't for me it was for someone else and then we were hardly there and another move was presented really without any thought.  I daydream about when I step off the plane on NY soil.  I have a feeling that my smile will be bigger then it has ever been, it will be a sense of relief that all the broken pieces of the last couple of months finally fell back into place.  My recovery has been interesting but I am thankful that one I was smart enough to reinvent and two brave enough to conquer Manhattan by myself.  Plus I dont have to answer to anyone but myself.

Life is good, isnt it?

The Nail & The Hammer

Delicate, soft, purely untouched gift so innocent to this big bad world.  Her fingers stretched out to the sky if only she knew she had hands.  Hands that will build sand castles, hands that will hold her own child.  Hands that will touch a million surfaces.

When I held her I knew nothing was actually that serious or sad.  Its such a speck of reality we think we live in.  When you hold a baby girl, when you touch the softness of her bald head you see that in that moment their life is the most simple it will ever be.  As an adult your needs and wants grow as a child all you need is the basics.  

My heart is already in love with her, with all of them.  Being an auntie holds such a pride fullness, such an extreme honest love that I never knew I had until children came into my life.  When I sometimes think of the last couple of hellish months, I surround myself with children and it all goes away.  It just doesn't matter anymore.  

Children have this unique ability to bring you right back into the present moment.  A moment adults seem to want to escape.  When you grow up and the needs and wants grow its like a constant list taking you ever so far away from where you are.  The future, the past never the now.  Someone very dear to me once told me "if you are always focusing on the future and dwelling in your past, when are you actually here?'  Are you actually enjoying it fully?  

When you watch a child hammer nails into a tree for 30 minutes I see determination and a undeveloped sense of time.  They don't live following a clock, they don't understand 5 minutes or 10 miles.  They see the nail and they see the tree and then they have their imagination.   An imagination stronger then the nails themselves, I watched him hammer nails and I never wanted that side of this little boy to grow.  I always want him to play, to never fully understand time and to always use his imagination.  They are so simple.  

When I hold Hartlee and already see a change in her face after one week, I know that I have entered a period in my life when I have gotten too consumed with time that I can no longer catchup with it.  Don't you feel like that sometimes?  Don't you feel like certain events take you further away, only if you let them.  When I see my babies grow I am reminded that although 26 is right around the corner I still feel like a child when I'm in the presence of one.  I want to hammer nails into trees and not wonder how long it took me to do so.  I want to play in the fall leaves, I want to get my clothes dirty and have mud on my face.  Now how can you tell me that that isn't life?   

How Much Debt Do You Carry?

I heard a profound quote the other day and it goes a little something like this...

A person is not how they treat their friends but how they deal with their enemies.

 I heard this and stopped and pondered at how simple yet complex this statement was.  Such truth in someone's overall character, some people never get this.  They think they can brush it off, sweep under the rug and shrug their shoulders as if it magically goes away.  IT DOESN'T.  I have been talking about this for a long time now that one creates a debt both good and bad with enemies or friends.  It's like a tide in the ocean that slowly creeps up into the sand overtime.  It may not always be visible but its there.  You put on your best poker face, shades and all and blindly walk through life never really acknowledging your debt.  But like any debt good or bad its like a third arm, its a part of you and only certain conscious beings can sense it.  I can see it all around me this third arm syndrome.  What people don't get is that this debt is fairly easy to clear but acknowledgment is needed in doing so.  Also a certain combination of forgiveness, respect and maturity.

When you observe your life one usually can shed some light on something that was clearly handled with disgrace.  If you quiet yourself long enough it will come from your belly to your spine and up into your brain that something went clearly wrong or clearly right.  It will require a small amount of feeling on your behalf and courage in saying that you fucked up or couldn't of done it any other way.  Admitting wrongs isn't easy, saying it was justified is a poor excuse creating even more debt.

Masking, replacing, guilt, lack of acknowledgment and having no time to heal are all part of the poker face.  It's still there, its a part of you and will remain a part of you no matter how much time passes you will always remember the taste someone left in your mouth.   Isn't life too short for all of this?  Why carry this with you and too bad you can't just cut it out of your life because it IS your life.  The book you write is so unique to yourself so when you read it stop at all the many chapters and acknowledge the charaters in it.  Did you do the right thing?  Can you clear that debt today?  Has too much time passed?  Did that make me feel good, did that make someone feel bad?

It's a crazy messed up world, no doubt but when I look at my credit score it makes me happy.  When I read my book and see my characters I am proud.  I wonder if the same is true for you.  Stop, reflect and learn and answer my question..How much personal debt do you carry?

Not Having a Bed

So I haven't had my own bed since May.25th, that's when I started living out of a suitcase which let me tell you HAS BEEN THE BEST TIME EVER!  Not only have I been completely nomadic but have also been without a consistent bed of my own, wait correction a ROOM of my own.  Laundry baskets and a suitcase filled with my life, my car has become my only real place.  Back and forth, life in multiple places sometimes I wonder if I deserved all of this?  What did I do?  The first couple of months were fine but now I'm pissed.  Nothing is more upsetting then a very bad immature breakup and then on-top of it not having a space is a whole new low for me.  

Since May.25th I have been stripped which is okay but I can only go so long, I can only take so much.  I am only one person.  I have done good and nobody around me has had such in intimate relationship with strength then I.  So I haven't had a bed, I know its just stuff but nothing feels more lonely then to not have a place of your own.  It's been long enough.   

Thank goodness the ticket to move to Manhattan has been booked for Oct.24th.  I paint a lovely picture of my new room.  A creative fresh and clean space of my own filled with my own things in their perfect little place.  My place, my home.  I know exactly what it's going to look like I paint this picture everyday in my mind.  That's how I know things are getting better.  I'm seeing a light at the end of the tunnel, my journey is taking me to something great.  I already did great things with the months in Minnesota.  I have seen 75 live shows, got my vision for the project, and put myself back together.  So maybe I don't have a bed right now but soon enough I will.  So I don't have a space of my own but in a few weeks I will.  

I never knew of my patience even though I'm at the last little bit of it.  I never knew of strength until I held my head up high and kept walking.  I never knew of courage until I left something that wasn't right.  I didn't know trust until I found it in myself and no-one knows real love until they have loved themselves first.   

If all I need is a bed and space I think I have done well considering my last year.  The most remarkable thing of all is that I didn't walk away from this with anger, distrust or an unwillingness to forgive and that my friends is a beautiful way to be.

I'm ready to have my space, my home and a bed to lay my head down at night.  And it doesn't hurt that  it will be in the greatest city in the world!