A Poem for You.

That Day

By: Dani Mueller 

Can you meet me here again? 

Come back to the place where it all begun

When you arrive I will make you stay

Those days stopped me

It made me see something 

A thing I thought I had given to someone else

As sure as the grass grows

For as long as the winter feels

It was real

This I know for sure

Like when the tide comes back to the sand

Like when the golden rays rise to wake the earth

And the moon makes a child less curious 

You had me

I had you

This I know for sure.

The only question now is

When...

When will I see you again?

When..

Will you come back to me?

Spring

Sometimes this world doesn't seem so grim when you believe in something.  When you truly can not be told that something doesn't exist.  Sometimes not always having a plan but following something just makes life less of drag.  When I saw the storm come down on me, when I felt as if everything was gray and tasteless something happened.

Something grabbed onto me, something offered a glimmer of hope.  Its almost like it said "you need to feel this and it needs to change you".  Your about to fall, your skimming rock bottom.  You lost your best friend and the love of your life and this is going to hurt you a lot,  but I will be here for you.  It was music.  It is that simple.  I see it more clearly now.  I understand what it was there for.  

He wasn't real.  Its like he was a fork in the road, I could go left or right.  This life is filled with those moments.  Either way, I turned to something that felt real to me.   Where he turned to another woman to ease the pain (weak) I turned to something that feed me in a way in which I didn't even need food to exist. I turned to something I needed to learn.  It was a NEED to learn, not a want.  I just believed in something.  There is an honesty in music that unites us all in this journey.  I think its a beautiful thing I also think that it is that simple.  Its not there to confuse you or complicate things for you, it makes you feel something.  Thank god for that.  Amen.   Its the only thing that made sense. 

 It picked me up from the lowest moment and continues to bring me to even bigger stages with even more familiar faces.  I now understand it better and it treats me kinder.  I get to do whatever it is I want with it and it never gets old.  I got lucky this last year and there is nothing I would change.  Nothing I would take back.  Do you know how it feels to come to such peace after it feels like you have been under 7 feet of snow? It was the coldest winter but yet it was usually 60 degrees outside.  It was the longest winter of my life.  Now the cherry blossoms are beginning to bloom on my street.  The breeze is crisp with the lingering hint of a winters past.     I see every ones winter coats slowly shed to bare more skin.  The sun even feels like a warm embrace you haven't had in awhile.  What I have now is the most important gift, a music to call my own and a wonderful change to mark a new journey ahead.  

The Hush of a NYC Crowd Moment

The hush.  The quiet serenity of all eyes focused and all you can hear is a single breath between many.  Makes me see that we all join in on something, together.  The lights are as bright as I can remember and I can only make out certain faces.  It may not be a huge crowd but I feel like the smaller ones are sometimes harder.  Theres more focus, the energy more direct.  From the moment the first note is played, all I can feel is energy.  A good energy kind of scary at first because its so alive.  So "there" with you.

People just love music.  It moves you and makes you feel.  It breaths life into your somewhat boring life.  Makes you want to believe in something.  I can say that we have played about 6 stages so far and every time the hush happens.  I call it the hush because I have to sit through many other acts and the energy seems messy or unfocused.  Some people bring it back, others lose it again.  See the crowd as a whole are very smart they sense exactly what I sense on stage.  They hear crap, they dislike crap.  They know when somethings purely good, they buy into it.

The first stage I stepped on (in over a year and a half) something very transformative happened.  I actually said it out loud, I said " I can feel the love."  I got a crowd smiling back at me.  Let me also add something here, it is very hard to grab the attention span of New Yorkers.  They move so damn fast and to be honest they don't really give a shit.  I knew then that something beautiful was happening.

We have to play small before we can play big, we have to put our time in.  We have to pay some dues, even though it sucks sometimes..it is what it is until the next door opens.  Its all about timing, it all happens when your ready.  This crazy little adventure I have been on makes me trust with complete confidence that I will fall exactly where I need to.  I believe in good music, I believe in a performer that takes you away from your everyday life.  I believe in our music without a shadow of a doubt.

I believe I will have to perform for 60 people before I can stand in front of 60,000 people.

The Dani & The Mad Men Channel on Youtube

No production crew, no edits and one take videos of Dani & The Mad Men.

2 new songs just uploaded.

https://www.youtube.com/user/daniandthemadmen

I dare you to tell a friend..

-Dani

Live Video of Dani & The Mad Men..

This wasn't handed to me, this also wasn't something that happened overnight.  This is not something that is going to hold your already deminishing attention span because there is no production crew behind it.  Its real and its honest.  Theres no glitz or glamour, no cutting and editing.  Its one take at its purest moment (something we take for granted).  

Its not auto-tune.

Theres no production crew.

However I will tell you what it is.. 

It is Dani & The Mad Men.    

Click and become a fan http://www.youtube.com/user/daniandthemadmen?ob=0&feature=results_main

Now please show your support and like Dani & The Mad Men on Facebook and on Youtube, and thank you for your continued support on this blog.  

I Missed You.

Its been a year and a half.  Even when I was on stage then I was a pussy and held back.  Not sure entirely why but I was untrained and under practiced.  I didn't lock myself in the bathroom for half the day, I just didn't have enough drive or disciple.  I was in the wrong place and singing from a place that didn't mean anything.  I was just a likable voice but nowhere on was an emotional vulnerability, you saw no scares.  You felt no pain, you didn't believe me.  You just listened but I didn't move you.  I didn't go into your chest and touch parts of your heart you didn't know existed.   I didn't make you think anything, I didn't challenge you enough.  I read words on paper, there is such a difference.  HUGE difference.

Now I know I have a long road ahead of me.  I did one live performance at a small venue for about 60 people, but all I know is something is different.   I feel something different, I move different...I feel my story being told and although fucked up we all share in it.  I believe it and too often in this world we tend not to believe.  I could hear a pin drop, I could hear someone breathing to the left of me.  I could see everyone in the front row, I felt the heat of the lights on my face.   I was home..

The truth remains though and there is one honesty to this story and that is that I am not myself when I go too long without the stage.   I'm not me.  Without it I feel as if I'm a shadow of myself.  This is awesome because it makes me want to seek out every stage, big or small.  I don't care, I just want it.  Audience or not (although it helps).

I couldn't rehearse anymore, I couldn't repeat the lyrics any more then I did.  I couldn't help the butterflies right before I was called up.  I couldn't fight the intense feeling of pride that I had created something.  The first is always the weirdest but from the moment I opened my mouth, I was at home.  A home I hadn't felt in a year and a half.  I missed it.  I was scared of it but I also intensely missed it, its shameful that I would go so long.  I had to go through this tho, the fact remains I wouldn't take any of it back.

My mother said "You are not Justin Bieber, your words come from a different place, a place that lasts."

Sing from that place.
Believe in that place.
Go to that place.
When on stage stay there in the place that makes you feel vulnerable but yet alive.

And never stop searching for that next stage.  PERIOD.

Hitting The NYC Stage on 02/16/12

Its been a long road.  Not only was I mending a broken heart but also going through 4 stressful moves and out of all of this I created Dani & The Mad Men.  We have been writing original music since December  (13 songs down) and now its time to go live around Manhattan.  This journey has taught me so much about strength and overcoming fear while always trusting your instinct.  Its about putting heart and soul back into music and sharing with others in our struggles and heartbreak.  Its saying that most stuff in this life isn't easy but you can go through it one step at a time while creating something beautiful for yourself.

Timing is everything and it's neither for you or against you..it just simply is.  I am beyond ready to showcase this moment with the world.  I am not fearful or shy neither embarrassed or doubtful.  I am not the Danielle I was 6 months ago, I am Dani.  The Dani that sits up at night writing music, that records on one take, that has been on stage at the Grammys (in spirit) and that will stop at nothing for the sake of my dream.

We hit the stage on Thursday and finally I wont be singing into a hairspray can in front of the mirror.  I am ready and deserving of this little thing I call Dani & The Mad Men.  Watch out the hard work starts now..

http://soundcloud.com/daniandthemadmen10

Real, honest, and ready..